5

I do not remember exactly in which the events of my early life took place. I can guess somewhat by the nightmares, how things happened to me.

I do, in fact, know that he started touching me when I was around 4 years old. The memory from 4 is scattered and fragmented but it retains significant events that the adult can remember.
The physical feelings that arose within me was not that of a normal child of my age. I felt physical pleasure and arousal at an early age of 4 years old.

The first event that can be remembered was the time that George spent the night with me and my brother Allen. It seemed innocent enough. I do not recall my brother sleeping with us and the foot of my parent's bed but I remembered George smiling and how I begged mom and dad to let us sleep in the floor. I remember lying there next to him but do not remember him touching me at that time, not yet.

One night while everyone was asleep, I used a pair of children's scissors to arouse myself. I noticed how it felt like electricity was passing throught the metal scissors and onto my flesh. I was so very young to feel this sensation. I remember that it felt curiously irritating and good at the same time.
Not long after this incident, George started to touch me. I think he was between the age of 16 and 18 years old.

A brief desription of myself as a child.

I was a cute child, maybe even beautiful. At birth, my hair had been coal black and my eyes almost the same depth. I was pale because of frequent sicknesses. As I grew older my hair lightened into a light auburn hue. My hair grew long and wavy down my back. I had a very cute smile which seemed to light up my face. At times in photographs though, it was obvious that some dark thing was already taking residence.

The store

My dad owned a store that he built from the ground up. I used to love to play around the store build things in the dirt. I remember building frog holes and little dirt houses. I even loved to make mud pies and harden them in the opening in the Coke machines. I played with bugs and spiders and ate many unedible things growing around the store building. I loved to be around my father and he doted on me. I remember his pleasantness at an early age.

There are so many things about the store that I remember. Especially how the customers rarely paid him. My father was always so good to others, sometimes better to them than his family. I know it is mean to say this but it is true. He often let them pay by way of credit and has credit booklets to keep up with it. But, most of the time, they never paid him. We lived on a hill surrounded by cousins and aunts and such and they didn't think that relatives should pay for anything from another relative. I think they just signed the credit booklet to humor my dad.

I remember that me, Allen and George used to play inside the store. You see, George and Allen were friends and I don't think my brother knew that George touched me.